The idea of spring cleaning is native to all cultures in one way or the other. Often related to the physical act of cleaning, it also signifies the cleansing of the soul and renewal of spirits. And I do understand why – I mean the dead winters are gone, sun starts showing up, and with all the light and warmth, it just becomes easier to have warmer hearts, too. You end up ridding yourself of the negativity and making space for the positivity & newness in the times to come. However, this year I want to focus on lessons I want to retain and do an ‘anti-spring clean’.
Before I get into it, big shoutout to my partner site Shein for the outfit featured in this article. I’ve linked it and some sale coupons at the end of the article for you.
As someone who cleans and organizes to destress, spring cleaning is a personal commitment I take very seriously. So, when I say anti spring clean, I don’t mean that you should cleanse yourself of the negative thoughts or reorganize your mental space and priorities. This is a thing to be done in addition to that so you don’t just ‘move on’ but show actual growth. After all, growth is all about the lessons life teaches you and how you perceive them.
So, here’s a list of 5 lessons I want to retain this year. They aren’t necessarily unique or revolutionary but they sure are hills we find ourselves injured on more than one occasion through our lifetime. Especially as a 20-something with unfolding pressures of life, I just wanted to do this to remind myself and share with anyone who may need it today!
1. Happiness isn’t effortless or simple
I think we put a lot of unnecessary burden on ourselves when we try to believe that all good things in life are effortless or simple. Happiness, especially, is a conscious effort that takes a lot of difficult decision making and finding the balance between what/who to keep and when to let go. In my experience, once you start recognizing this, you can start actively engaging things that make you happy and navigate through the others in way that doesn’t burden you.
2. You’re not responsible for another person’s insecurities and low self-esteem
Speaking of burden, a lot of cultural and social learning emphasizes on the consequences of actions and how we should take accountability of them. Now that is absolutely correct. However, sometimes you need to step back and question whether a reaction is a consequence of your action or its coming from a place of another person’s insecurities and/or low self esteem. This is where it is healthy to draw a boundary. Depending on your relationship with the said person, you can try confronting or even helping them through this rather difficult commotion. But not for a second try to indulge if it disrupts your mental health or causes you anxiety. It’s a great gesture to try to help someone but you’re not responsible for it so it’s just as great to step away.
3. Blaming anything or anyone, including yourself is counter-productive
Another think about actions and accountability is that when we actually do something that results in an unfavorable result, we end up either blaming others around us, the situation, or even ourselves for it. This, I found, is one of the most unhealthy and counterproductive way of dealing with the said unfavorable result. Instead you should choose a healthy way to handle failure and the first step is full acceptance. I actually wrote a dedicated article about it a while ago that you can check out by clicking here.
4. Empathy and defensiveness can’t co-exist
Often when most of us get confronted by something uncomfortable are pointed out about our mistakes, we tend to be defensive. Defensiveness (aggressive or not) often comes out acknowledgment of the ‘wrongdoing’ but is quickly followed by reasoning of why it is still justified. Here, I say, that it is important to learn to see the situation from the other person’s POV and understand why it was important enough for them to bring it up. Almost naturally, you’ll find that true empathy and defensiveness can’t coexist and you will find yourself handling uncomfortable situations in a more mature and healthy manner. Even learn and grow with them.
5. Being strong enough to let go is the ultimate power
Lastly but most importantly, learn to let go. Of grudges, negative feelings, bad memories – anything that causes hurt to you, just find your process and unburden yourself. Because when you hold on to all those, not only are you blocking your happiness but also feeding your negativity when the situation &/or person that caused them may not be mirroring these feelings at all. So, if you want to feel and exercise your ultimate power, just be an Elsa and let it go!
Well, that was all about my anti spring clean motivations. I definitely feel lighter and more motivated to embark upon the incoming turn of seasonal cycles. Hope I instilled these lessons in you and helped you advance in your self-love journey, too.
Can you think of any more lessons you’d like to retain in this anti spring clean? Did you love one lesson more than the others? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments section below.
As promised, get my beautiful outfit from Shein by directly clicking on the links below:
You can use the following sale codes to get these and a lot more from you shop on the site: