Numerous things pop in the head whenever we think of the word.
Many, generally, create an image of a female with humongous breasts, fashion addict, a titillating physique to match with, a voice like silk, twinkling eyes, but no less than a bear trap, what with all her PMSing, insatiable love for shopping, titivating 24X7, fussing over her not being slim, assuming that she’s always right even when she’s wrong, bitching about people, not being able to keep secrets, pouting, selfie and “garnering Facebook likes” obsession, as I like to call it and so on; in short, a bittersweet pain in the ass. I admittedly fostered the same image in my mind long ago, since I did not really possess these attributes, and would flinch every time somebody would attempt to remotely associate me with the four letter word. I would aggressively respond, and that would be the end of the story.
Up until I had my own moment of revelation.
Today, when somebody says, “You’re such a girl”, I revel in the ‘compliment’ for a few moments, smile broadly, say my heartfelt thanks and move on.
Not because people believe that I exhibit the above qualities; no, I still lack them, but because my version of being a girl is not based on any notion.
Yes, I’m a girl, because I squeal like a kid and hyperventilate on reading about Shahrukh Khan, Tom Cruise and many more. I even love reading fan fiction and ship several fictitious characters. And I am not ashamed of it, or embarrassed by it.
I detest the colour pink, diamonds are not my best friend, Mills and Boon is not my cup of tea, the word “awwww” drives me crazy, I love watching ODIs and discussing them, PC and mobile games are my thing, my heart beats for sports and I’m a girl still. I believe in comfort in fashion. Sometimes I do bash myself for not being slimmer only because I can’t be comfortable in that one dress. Dressing-up? Selfies? Facebook? I can or not do it whatever I feel like. Girls gotta have fun!
I menstruate every month, but I am not ashamed of discussing it with my male friends, or bugging them with my PMS because that’s how it is intended to be, and I revel in it.
I do all things cliched in your notion about me and I do a lot more but unlike the notion, I don’t base my judgments on what I hear.
I appreciate sarcasm, and no, I don’t always take offence to the bad things you say about me. I don’t believe that I am perfect and always right, and I also believe in not sugarcoating everything that I say, but being brutally blatant on the face. I will be nice to you initially, but if I don’t like you, I won’t make you feel otherwise, and convey it to you in my own subtle way. I don’t count my calories, in-fact, no one does that.
I even manage to keep deep dark secrets within me. I don’t believe in being coy, I like being bold and conveying that message to others.
I may be physically weaker, but I am stronger than you think, and definitely not fragile.
I am a feminist even if I appreciate the chivalrous attributes of pulling the chair, opening the door, because I know how to return gestures. I may stay silent initially when a guy stares at me, but that is because I give them the benefit of the doubt. If I am hanging out with a guy without any inhibitions, I’m not signalling him to make a move on me, I’m asking him to be my friend. I can be very nice to you, but I can also be like that bitch you complain about every time, even worse.
What people seem to have assumed and deduced about our clan, or any clan for that matter, is actually something that does not represent us, in character, or even otherwise. We often fall prey to such dogmas, and cease to use our cerebral part, because what has been already defined needs no further deliberation, and the case is rested. However, I wish to break the stereotype that has clutched us for a while now, and dare to redefine it, for my own sake, and not for others to learn and imbibe. Every girl has the freedom to recreate it in a manner that suits them, and others simply need to accept it, or respect it at the very least, instead of forming blind ideas based on the common norms. And the above literary rant is my own twist to the layman assumption. I am all of that, and much, much more, and that’s what actually defines me, and probably anyone else, as a Girl. And I am unflinchingly and undeniably proud of being one.